Three Strategies for Getting Over Yourself | Joseph Goldstein

Overview

Joseph Goldstein, a renowned meditation teacher, shares insights from his recent three-month silent retreat, focusing on the three proliferating tendencies (papañca) that perpetuate an unhealthy sense of self. These tendencies—craving, conceit, and wrong view—are explored as key contributors to human suffering. Goldstein offers practical strategies to reduce self-centeredness, align with the impermanent nature of reality, and cultivate greater freedom and peace.

Notable Quotes

- Grasping and cherishing that which does not exist is the center of all our suffering. – Joseph Goldstein, on the illusion of self.

- We need to stop being imperialists in our own minds. – Joseph Goldstein, on the mental proliferation of craving and self-centeredness.

- The I am is like an eddy in the stream of experience—it’s not a pleasant state; it’s a contraction of our being. – Joseph Goldstein, on the pervasive nature of conceit.

🧠 Understanding the Three Proliferating Tendencies

- Craving: The tendency to claim things as mine, leading to attachment and suffering. Goldstein explains how even subtle overlays, like thinking my leg during walking meditation, reinforce this tendency.

- Conceit: Beyond arrogance, this refers to the deeply ingrained sense of I am, manifesting in comparisons (better, worse, equal) or identification with past and future selves. Goldstein highlights how this creates a contraction in the mind.

- Wrong View: The belief in a substantial, unchanging self. Goldstein likens the self to a river—just a designation for a flow of changing elements, not a fixed entity.

🌍 The Six Building Blocks of Experience

- Goldstein introduces the Buddha’s concept of the all, which encompasses six elements: sight, sound, smell, taste, touch, and mental objects (thoughts, emotions).

- He emphasizes that suffering arises not from these sensory experiences but from our mental responses to them.

- By recognizing the impermanence of these elements, we can reduce attachment and live in greater harmony with reality.

🗣️ The Role of Language in Shaping Experience

- Goldstein underscores how language conditions our perception of reality. For example, using the passive voice (a sound is being heard) removes the I from the equation, aligning with the truth of non-self.

- This linguistic shift fosters effortlessness in meditation, allowing experiences to arise and pass without clinging or aversion.

- He suggests a simple practice: ask, What is being known? during meditation to cultivate this perspective.

🌪️ Practical Exercises to Counter the Proliferating Tendencies

1. Passive Voice Practice: Reframe experiences in the passive voice (e.g., a sensation is being felt) to reduce the sense of I am.

2. Elemental Awareness: During activities like walking, label sensations as elements (e.g., air element for movement, earth element for touch). This dissolves the sense of ownership and reinforces the impersonal nature of experience.

3. Focus on Disappearance: Shift attention from arising phenomena to their passing away. This practice highlights impermanence, reduces clinging, and fosters a profound sense of freedom.

🌊 Embracing Impermanence and Non-Self

- Goldstein uses the metaphor of free-falling to describe the stages of insight into impermanence: exhilaration, fear, and finally, equanimity.

- By recognizing the continual arising and passing of phenomena, we can let go of grasping and rest in the peace of non-clinging.

- Even brief moments of this understanding plant seeds for deeper liberation.